when pigs fly

skepticism

Disposition toward doubt

• doubtLack of firm belief
• incredulityInability to accept something
• cynicismDistrust of human sincerity

scoffing · dismissal · eye-roll · yeah right · sure thing · as if · don't hold your breath · fat chance · not likely · dream on

never

At no point

• impossibleIncapable of occurring
• unattainableImpossible to acquire
• unachievableCannot be accomplished

improbable · unrealistic · unfeasible · impracticable · unobtainable · futile · hopeless · snowball's chance · blue moon · miracle

absurdity

Wildly illogical quality

• fancifulImaginatively unrealistic
• fantasticalExtravagantly unreal or imaginary
• cartoonAnimated or humorous illustration

illustration · figurine · novelty · playful · lighthearted · amusing · silly · humorous · comical · ridiculous

irony

Meaning opposite to words

• mockeryScornful ridicule or travesty
• derisionContemptuous mockery
• snarkCutting, mocking commentary

ridicule · wit · quip · retort · comeback · deadpan · dry humor · tongue-in-cheek · scorn · contempt

• Animal Idiomsblind as a bat, brave as a lion, busy bee, copycat, dark horse
• farm idiomsmake hay while the sun shines, cream of the crop, put the cart before the horse, till the cows come home, buy the farm
• folk sayingsproverb, adage, maxim, folk saying, old saying
• idiomstime flies, hit the sack, seize the day, ring a bell, break a leg
• refusalsno, decline, no thanks, refuse, nope
• disbeliefdisbelief, no way, incredulity, unbelievable, yeah right